found flowers.....

I bought a few flowers today...I think that's all I'm going to buy maybe..i may buy a few more to fill in my flower beds because I want it to be really colorful and full of pretty flowers...BUT I definitely won't be buying any roses to plant until I can plant them with my Dad and friends...that's my promise!!! absolutely NO ROSES PLANTED or BLUE FLOWERS until them...

the flowers I bought today were:

Gerbera Daisy--Pink and orange

Marigolds--Yellow and orange

Petunias--Purple

I looked out the window on the way to town and saw a lot of rainy clouds and it made the sky look so pretty...I wish there were always pretty clouds in the sky like that.....hope it thunderstorms...just no tornados.

love ya.

things to do.....

It's thundering...I really hope it rains...

Still haven't bought me any flowers yet...I need to finish cleaning out the rest of my old flower beds.

I've made a list of things we can do in the future that will be fun...

go to concerts

go to cow sales and horse sales

go to chicken sales

go to the mall

sing karaoke

go to church

work with cows and horses

eat healthier and work out in the gym

paint

go to rodeos

take vacations anywhere we wanna go

Can't wait to see you.....Love you DadChad

fish.....

Tonight I'm going to be eating some crappie fish a friend of the family gave us...I know people will look at that and say:"Haha crappy fish!!!"...but it sounds like crop-eee...haha...That's how you say it in Oklahoma...

catfish and crappie are my favorite fish to catch and eat for dinner...really good.

I like to go fishing and I'd like to buy all new fishing gear and all that...I like looking at the lures and I think Oklahoma has lots of good lakes to go fishing in!!!...I wish I was out there today fishing or something on the water...good day for going to a lake...

I really wanna water ski or ride a wave runner at the lake...been a loooong time...miss that.

pretty sunny warm day today...still wish it would rain.

love ya.

saving someone's life....

There are many people in the world and this country who save lives everyday...Without them around a lot of people would be hurt or sick or lost...

Doctors, nurses, firefighters, soldiers, policemen...put their lives on the line everyday to keep us all safe...Those can be very dangerous and spooky jobs...not to mention stressful and tough to work in...I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like to have that much of a responsibility for soooooo many people at one time...

Putting their lives on the line to keep that many people safe must be stressful...I'm happy that we have all these people working these jobs.....the more honest and hardworking they are the better and also dependable because so many lives can be at stake at one time...

There are lots of people who work these jobs all the time and I think we don't really think about how much we need to be telling them "thank you" for keeping us all safe...I know they have saved my life from time to time I'm sure....so I appreciate them too!!!

thanks for always looking after me people!!!

love j.

it will be ok.....

I love people who love me and care about me....And that's why I want to always thank my Dad for taking care of me and standing up for me when things have gotten dangerous and spooky...I have stood up for him for years and defended him because he has always loved me and cared about me...

The saddest thing for me would be for my Dad to EVER be angry with me or mad at me about something stupid I do or say..I would never want to hurt his feelings or anything...He couldn't hurt my feelings about anything....

I love my DadChad so much for everything he's ever tried to do for me and for keeping me safe...Because there have been so many things that could have happened to me and he has saved my life over and over...because he loves me.

I miss him so much and I can't see him for awhile...and that makes me sooooo sad...I cry a lot about it because I miss him...and I just want him to know that I love him a lot.

I worry about him a lot because I can't ever see him and I just wanna know that he's ok...But I believe he's alright...

really I just wanna tell him how much I love him and that every time he has defended me and took care of me I will always do the same for him.


love J.

don't ever commit suicide....

A lot of bad things can happen to a person, or things that they think about can make a person feel hopeless and sometimes want to die...That's the saddest thing to me to think that someone I love would ever want to end their life...

I couldn't even begin to think about losing someone I love to suicide...If I EVER lost my DadChad, my Grandpa/Grandma or my Uncle L and Uncle B, or my brother or all my nice cousins to something like that I would feel so sad about that...if they ever thought about committing suicide I would just lose myself in hopelessness....Because I need all of them in my life...They need to be around to help look after me...because we are a family!!!

I don't want anyone to EVER think about committing suicide because it's so awful to end your life because of the way you feel or some awful things that have happened to you....even people I don't know..it would make me sad to think about them too.

If you feel like ending your life you need to talk to a Doctor or a therapist and take your medication...there's lots of ways to cope with how you feel about things....So if you ever feel like committing suicide think about me and know I sure don't want anyone to EVER think about committing suicide....

things get bad for everyone and everybody feels lost and hopeless from time to time....but things pass all bad things pass and you have to look to the future don't live in the past...don't look back and if you need to talk about how you feel talk to a doctor about it or a therapist because you need to always talk with them about things and take your medication...

I've NEVER felt suicidal or depressed...sure I cry about things and get scared but I have NEVER felt like committing suicide or anything.....I just mainly journal about how I feel or listen to music...AND always remember it's ok to cry about things and get upset....I've just never needed to talk to a therapist or take medications because I don't have those suicidal thoughts or anything...

Sure I know bad things can and will happen but you can't go around feeling suicidal and lost all the time because there will always be bad days but there's always good days to on the way..so take the good with the bad and all that....it's ok to feel sad at times but always remember that you have someone who loves you and would miss you more than anything if they ever lost you...because they need you..I sure do...I need everyone in my life who loves me.

it would be sad to commit suicide over something that isn't going to last very long...so always remember that bad things pass and so do bad feelings...don't think it won't ever be over..because there are good things to happen soon...... there's always something good to happen eventually...

the best thing to do is laugh and try to surround yourself with laughter and not think about so much sad stuff all the time....sure it's ok to cry but it's also ok to laugh yourself silly about stupid people and stupid things..always find humor in stupidity...haha!!!...I know I do with all the stupid nosy hillbillies I know!!! :) 

hugs!!!

cranberry juice........

It RAINED!!! yay!!!

I know it's silly to get sooooo excited about rain but I appreciate everytime it rains or storms...makes me feel better...my allergies are better and so is my asthma.

My favorite kinda day is a rainy day or stormy day....

I bought a lemonade today...I love lemonade...Then whenever I got back home after I drank it I put cranberry juice in it...Cranberry juice is good for kidneys...I only drink 100% juice....it's the healthiest...I'd kinda like to drink the blueberry cranberry juice one all the time....it is good...but I don't know yet.....I don't know yet if it's 100% juice.

yeah you know me all about kidney infections and all cranberry juice or the tablets work pretty good for me...and I drink A LOT of water all the time to keep my kidneys flushed out...

I love water.

all I drink is water, water, water , water and juice....everybody laughs at me for drinking so much water and having to go pee all the time!!!...Haha!!! Water is good for your skin and everything about you because your body is made up of almost all water practically anyway...

I don't drink sodas...I had to quit those a long time ago because they make my kidneys hurt and I get infections....worst feeling in the world I think...but that's just me not everybody...

so if a person wants to drink sodas that's their business...not to knock the soda companies or anything...I just know that I can't drink them and if you have kidney problems you probably shouldn't drink them either....

I hope my DadChad isn't drinking all those sodas..

I love you.

nite nite!!!

minding your own business.....

Over the past few years it seems a lot of people just wanna get their nose in my business and try to pry around in my life..for what reason I have no idea.....

I don't talk to people from that small town or the hillbilly kinfolks from that town....and I don't know ANY of those people anymore!!!...I might have known them 15 years ago...but I don't know any of them now...

I just don't see why anybody would wanna try to find out anything about me or anything I'm doing because I just don't care about what they do all the time because I don't know any of them...they like to get their nose in my business so when I find that out I get kinda mad about it...so I hear things and I hear lies and all kinds of crap like that....haha!!!

so why is not right for me to wonder about what the heck those hillbillies do all the time when that's all they wanna do to me...I have a right to wonder...

BUT...I just don't give a shhh*t....Haha!!!

booooooring.

oh another day.

wounded veterans....

One of the things that makes me really sad is when I think about the wounded veterans and even non-wounded veterans in our country.I really wish I could help them out more because it's so sad for them when they put their life on the line to protect our country...I mean, they give their lives to defend our country and put themselves in danger!!!

I just cry when I think about all the good they do for our country and how unappreciated it seems they are...When you see a soldier or a wounded veteran on the street you should tell them thank you...My grandpa was in the army way back years ago and I always think about that whenever I see a soldier or a veteran...it makes me bawl my eyes out when I think of how much they give our country.

their lives get disheveled and everything..their family life is uprooted and changed around and I know that's tough on them....I think they deserve more appreciation for all the good they do!!!
THANK YOU!!! soldiers and veterans from me!!!

As for my family I also think a person should always tell someone they love them and let them know you mean it so they will know you always love them no matter what!!! When you love someone you cry when they cry just like I cry with my Dad when I'm upset about something that makes me sad....

I think I'm going to have to buy me a few new blue t-shirts....my other one got bleach on it and I only have one other one...guess i'll buy me a new one or 2 for Spring and start wearing those things...I LOVE BLUE it's my favorite!!! MY good luck color!!!

nite nite!!!

if you get scared.....

I think everybody needs a hero...or someone that they can think about when they are frightened or scared....Everyone gets scared or frightened from time to time and it's ok...Anyone you love can be your hero or even someone you don't even know...

I have lots of people I think of when I get scared....I think of them and I think about all the fun things I could be or will be doing with them, when I finally get to see them...So whenever I feel really scared or upset I think about them and things aren't so bad...

one of the hardest things to do is go through something spooky without someone you love by your side...so whenever that happens I think about them.I usually think about the toughest people in my life and I try to think about how they would deal with something that scarey to them.....

I always think about my family members usually...I think about my DadChad, Grandpa, Grandma, brother and my uncle L. and my other uncle B. and all those cousins that care about me and are nice too!!!...because I know that they might know how to not be scared of things that are spooky...

If they ever get scared I want them to know that they can think about me and not be scared either...I don't really think there's anything to be scared of actually so when you get scared just think about me and know it will all be ok...and spooky things don't last that long....nothing ever stays wrong that long...it has to go away eventually!!!...

I would be anybody's hero anyday...so if they get scared of anything spooky they can think about me and something silly I would say or do...

love you.

dust mask.....

I've had a lot of problems with allergies lately and my asthma has been making me cough really bad...It's kinda tough to be working out in the barn in the dust so my Dad told me today I needed to buy me a dust mask so I wouldn't be getting pneumonia and asthma really bad from all the dust in the barn.....

I've been using a handkerchief to keep the dust out of my nose and lungs when I'm breathing so he thinks I should use a dust mask like he used when he was working around cows and stuff because the dust blew all the time around him and he had to keep a dust mask on so he wouldn't breathe all that in.

I think that's a good idea because I have asthma and allergies so I'm going to be buying me one pretty soon because I have got to get a stop put to all that dust blowing around...I don't need anymore pneumonia or bronchitis problems....

love ya.

J.

oh groceries...again...

I've found a new breakfast snack...those tiny little tangerines I just call them baby angel oranges!!!...haha...Pretty cool and easy to peel.I have a peeler for oranges and it's the neatest thing.I don't like those real oranges that much because they make me have a tummy ache..so these are perfect for me....But all oranges are good so there ya go!!!

Of course these are healthy for breakfast....Not much of a fan of oatmeal but I like peaches in oatmeal..I know oatmeal is healthy for you...but I'm going to start eating more of it for breakfast because it's good for cholesterol and all that good stuff...

my favorite thing to eat is crepes...I love to make crepes.....Haha!!!...I know it's wrong to love those things...but I LOVE to make them with fruit pie filling for breakfast...of course I know what tastes good...well I think I do anyway...Peaches are my favorite to use for crepes....

I can't wait to make breakfast for my family and friends and everybody who loves me...I think family time around the dinner table is a great thing...I think people should cook at home more often because it's something people don't do much of anymore...

My Grandma has given me a few recipe books and recipes..both of my Grandmas have and they are the best southern cooks in the whole world...My aunts can cook that good ol southern food sooooo good and it's always got healthy stuff in it and some not so healthy BUT good tasting stuff...oh my goodness, God bless America!!!

I'm learning to cook and I have got those cookbooks out and looked over them and studied them and it's a lot of fun learning to cook..It's more special if you cook at home and you can cook with your family and friends too and laugh and giggle while you cook...haha!!!

I think it's always been special to me to have all breakfast/lunch/dinner together with family/friends because you get to spend time with them and just be around them and talk and mostly giggle yourself silly about the nerdiest, stupidest, funniest stuff...

that's so special I think for a person to have that dinner/social time with your loved ones..not many people do that at all and I think that's sad.I know not everyone is able to do that all the time because of their jobs and stuff....but even if you spend time together at a restaurant you need to laugh and talk...because that's how your life should be..laughing and talking all the time with your loved ones...

so whenever someone sees you with a grocery cart loaded down with groceries I just laugh whenever they have seen me before...they're probably thinking:"Why in the heck does she have all those groceries in that cart???!!!"

umm because I like to cook at home.....lol

i wish it would thunderstorm....

I WISH it would rain so the pastures would grow for the cows...because I am getting so tired of this drought...you look down at the ground and it's March and I think, I don't know if it will grow and be green again....BUT you have to think that things will get better soon and don't give up hope.....in anything in life.

I remember the last drought there was no rain and that was the worst year with it being so hot and dusty...no rain....and I was wanting to get a few cows then and I was down about it because I thought I wouldn't be able to have cows because of no rain...AND my Dad told me:"Things will get better....things change....they won't stay the same...you'll get cows....all you need is 3."

I like it to thunderstorm but it hasn't done that yet!!! That's one of my favorite things is a rainy day and a thunderstormy day...I sleep best when it does.I wish I could pay a rain cloud to rain or Lightning...I love it to be Stormy.I love it when the sky is Blue.

Love you nite nite!!! :)

be strong.....

I'm thinking about planting some flowers pretty soon.....I don't know what all kinds of flowers I will buy yet...I like all colors and I would really like to buy some blue ones!!!

I like roses but I think I need to find some with a better tolerance to weather because most of them I have had died off for some reason....I think the hillbilly kinfolks probably sprayed something on them at night to kill them off or something...just like they ruin everything for everybody anyway....lol...

They don't matter anyway...who cares about them.They just make fun of me because I have NEVER done drugs or anything like that and I ignore them..haha!!!...I've never had an addiction to anything but sugar and music!!!...I don't ever judge people who have done drugs or had addictions and I will always be here for my loved ones or people I don't know if they need me to go with them to a rehab/treatment center.....

I need to just "keep on keepin' on" as they say...don't let anyone stop me from living my life or ruining things for me, AND never give up...so if they ruin things for me i'll just get back up and dust off my jeans and say ok you can't stop me...i'll just start all over.....because I WIN.

Just like when things in life knock you down or things knock you down...don't feel sorry for yourself just get right back out there and be strong.....my Daddy told me to start taking up for myself so that's what I intend to keep on doing...

see all I really want is for him to be ok and for him to know that I love him more than anything in the whole world and I miss him...People have tried to play mind games and tell me things about him that I know are NOT true...AND even if they were I wouldn't care!

He knows I love him and I will always be there for him and if he ever needs me to help him with anything or go anywhere with him I will always be here for him to go with him, i will take care of him, and I can't wait to see him and give him the biggest hug in the whole world!!! 

I can't wait to see my DadChad and go live with him and take care of him...I think I could probably bake him one of those chocolate cakes he likes(without icing of course)..because I love him so much...

I love you Daddy!!!

sweet as sugar......

I LOVE sugar so much....It's just that someone in my family has diabetes and I am going to change my cooking skills into cooking healthier with some of that fake sugar!!!...haha..There's one thing I don't like and that is fake people...but I LOVE fake sugar because you can cook sweets for your family and friends....

I really think I'm going to be cooking a lot for my loved ones in a short while so I am going to start using and practicing with these fake sugar substitutes.....I mean, I can eat sugar just fine but I'm going to start cooking with sugar substitute for my loved ones so we can all be healthier!

A little sugar here and there is not going to hurt me because I don't have sugar diabetes and I can start practicing on perfecting this sugar thing for my Dad too!!! I know that cooking with fake sugar is kinda a tough one they say....but I will do this and figure it all out.

they say I'm so sweet I don't need to be eating sugar...any sweeter and they don't know what they will do with me!!!...Bwahahaha!!!...I'm so funny...(ask my brother he'd probably tell you different about the sweet thing)....lol.

nite nite!!!

it's going to be ok!!!.......

I suppose it's ok to feel insecure this morning...because I tend to get very confused about things in my life...especially when my family and other loved ones aren't near...I need to just laugh it off...but it's ok to be scared of things you can't understand....

My problem is when I can't see my family or friends I get VERY insecure...I get over emotional and cry and all that...when I have a case of the sads!!! I don't get sad a lot or anything and I clearly am not depressed I don't want anyone to think that at all.....I just want things to happen right when I want them to...and I have all the dreams I want to happen right then and I have to be patient...being patient is something I am NOT good at!!! as usual I need to work on being patient in every aspect of my life.

I think it's good to journal about all your anxieties and fears about things in your life...because that is what I do.Maybe that has helped me get through things in my life...?

being strong with God is the only thing that can actually get your through anything...I believe that if you don't have a spiritual guide(like God) you can get lost..but you have to trust in him to get you through things...I think I need to pray more but sometimes I don't pray because I know he will take care of things for me.....

I have anxieties just like everyone else.....I try to laugh a lot about things I don't understand and I try to just not care about the serious stuff so much because I know God will see me through it...so I make jokes and laugh at myself because I know I'm never gonna be perfect or be who anybody else wants me to be...

I'm just me and people who love me for ME love me for all my flaws and imperfections they don't care if I have on no makeup,or my weight is not a perfect size -0, or I eat whatever or wear whatever because all that stuff doesn't matter one bit..

so what if you wanna eat cupcakes or whatever!!! oh who cares!!!

see the thing is I'm happy being who I am.Take it or leave it that's me.

you should just be yourself if you have flaws that's ok but you need to make sure you take care of the BAD flaws that cause you harm....like addictions and behavior that harms yourself and others because that is what can harm you or kill you....The best thing a person needs to do to get rid of their BAD flaws is get help for them so you can deal with your behaviors that will eventually kill you or harm you and your loved ones..

Nobody wants to lose someone that they love to a addiction or a self harming behavior....because it's sooooo easy to lose the ones you love to addictions and self harm.....I think if you feel like you are losing control of bad behaviors and bad flaws in your life you definitely need to get help for it everybody does...because even if you can't feel it or see it you have someone who loves you and you don't wanna ruin their lives by losing yourself because they need you.

and I have soooo many people that I need in my life right now.

i love cupcakes.....

Think I love cupcakes!!!

I wanna buy some cupcakes at the store pretty soon.

I like sprinkles and colored icing ones.With decorations on them.

I still love The Little Mermaid..those are super cute!!!

have a great day.

xoxo J

rehab and addiction....

I was just thinking about people who have drug addiction and how much I want them to know that it's ok to cry and be upset.Crying is the best thing anyone can do in a rehab facility and to know that your family and friends will love you no matter what you have done or been through in life.

Family and friends are the best thing to get you through recovery..I'm sure at first it is tough and a little stressful but you should just know that your family and friends love you and are very proud of you for being strong enough to go to rehab......

And going to rehab for the people you love is the BEST thing a person could ever do..Because it proves to your loved ones that you love them that much to toss away the drugs in exchange for a beautiful life with your friends and family!!!

who needs those drugs when you have people who adore you and love you..when all you need is that love not an addiction to something that will never ever numb your pain...A person can heal their pain with  all kinds of things like love, music and art..which is what I think a person should get lost in!!! That is so much more beautiful than a drug that will eventually kill you...Music, art, and love are all a person needs to survive.

Drug addiction or any kind of addiction is caused by pain in someone's life..so when you feel sad you should get lost in your family,friends, music and art!!!that's far more wonderful than a yucky old drug!!!

I feel so sad for all the people affected by drug addiction and I hate how it makes people feel so lost...it's time to throw back the curtain and get lost in the beauty in the world instead of a stupid addiction to something that will NEVER make you laugh or smile like it's real...drugs are fake and phony and not real..BUT Family,Love,Music, and Art are real...that's all that should ever matter.

I think people should have hobbies like music.painting or anything that they like that isn't harming themselves or anyone that is just something beautiful that they like to do....Taking care of animals or reading or anything like that..playing music is another..or even journaling..which I think is good for people to do..

I am so PROUD of anyone that I know or don't know to go to rehab and get cleaned up!!! I will always be there for anybody who needs someone to help them in this darkness...There's so much in the world to see and experience than sitting there wasting time with addiction.

It takes time and patience but you will get through it..just know that God is always with you and so am I. I love you Daddy.

nite-nite.

lies....lies...lies....

I'm up early this morning thinking about how sick and tired I am of the BS mind games people have been trying to play on me....people from that old redneck town I unfortunately had to grow up in...some people who DO NOT even know me too.

First off they have been telling me a pack of lies about my Dad for the past couple of years.Saying that he hates me,he's dead, he's moved off and left me and he does this, he does that...and they have made this crap up about me also.

They have tried to tell me all kinds of lies about things he has done and said and he has all these problems and these people try to mouth at me about all this stuff they think he has done or said about me....I know that's very untrue! I know my friends love me also and that I have figured out that all the lies they have tried to tell me about them are also nothing but hot air out of hillbilly mouths!!! LIES.

So when that happened what I did was get online and try to see what the hell they have been mouthing at me this whole time to see if it was true.Because I don't have any way to find out any truth to anything going on with these people around there.And apparently these people from this redneck town have been hacking my wireless internet and my cellphone and I am sick of it....

I want my Dad to be in my life and be ok.I just want to take care of him and live with him so he will be ok...because he's my Dad....he'd do the same for me.

So they found out I was checking court records to see just what the hell they have been screaming at me was all about...So you know what I found out?!..That they have all been lying to me about my Dad, my family and my friends this WHOLE TIME...but you know what I DID find out? That all these people who have been making up all these sick nasty lies about me and my Dad and my friends,those people all like to sit around on the front church pew almost every sunday morning and the others are out there doing the same shhht but just not hiding in the church!...So Ha!!!! LIARS.

They have screamed things at me and made up lies about me and my family, me and my dad, me and my friends and just any kind of crap they can think of...It's all because they are jealous of my Father Daughter relationship with my Dad....and my friendships...half this BS comes from the hillbilly kinfolk and people in that town...it makes me laugh about it all.

They're all still screaming around that I have some kinda damn stupid money or some crap that I have no clue what in the world they are so damn mad about...I don't even know what the heck their problem is but I'm laughing at how stupid all these hillbilly idiots are around here...because they are all screaming lies at me all the time because I stood up for my Dad and my family who are trying to protect themselves and me, from them...because ya know what?! They LOVE ME!....

My Dad is the most important person in my life because he is the only person who loves me..and the most important relationship in my life is my Father Daughter relationship with my Daddy!..I'm JUST his daughter and I will always be his baby daughter...I think that makes a lot of people mad because I have someone who loves me and is my FATHER!!! I just laugh at all the damn lying all the time and these rednecks will never sabotage my relationship with my Father!!!

he is the person I look to for strength because he is tough and a daughter looks to her father for that and I think a lot of people got a case of the jealous over that....he knows I love him and I would never treat him badly or anything.I love him so much.

I can't ever see him or even really know where he is at right now..i want to see him!!!.but I know wherever he is I will see him soon and I know he loves me and that he knows I love him more than anything in this world!!! I really hope that if he has heard all these lies about me or that I hate him are all UNTRUE!!!....Just laugh about it Dad wherever you may be because we all know I am not a piece of crap like all them and that I LOVE YA!

 I know every one of these idiot hillbillies who have screamed at me and told me all these lies made this crap up...and guess what? I have your names written down on a piece of paper and it's light blue...in purple ink.

I think of a word when I think of lies and you know what it's called?

 slander = court.

slander n. defamation, in which someone tells one or more persons an untruth about another which untruth will harm the reputation of the person defamed.

I Love you Dad and the rest of my family/friends who love me..don't worry about nothing!!!

J.

stand up for yourself!!!.........

One thing I have learned is that you can't let people intimidate you with threats or harassment.Because a lot of crooked people work off intimidation....trying to scare you..thinking they are entitled to bully you around because they think you can be scared.

I don't think anyone should be made to feel scared or frightened of trying to live their life.I don't like feeling scared and intimidated.I don't think it's fair to feel that way in your life.Sometimes I wonder how some people can go on living their lives without feeling so scared or intimidated.

I really think that it's cruel to treat someone so badly just because of who they may be related to or know...I NEVER bother anybody but yet,some people out there think it's just fine to bother me all the time or "try to" scare me...LOL!....

I think I should be able to pick and choose how I want to live my life and who I want to be in my life..and that makes me upset.

So don't ever go around and let people tell you what the hell you are gonna do or who you are going to see or who you want to be in your life....because that's NOT a life that's called ridiculous and sad.

oh woah is me...as usual....ridiculous all around.*eyeroll*

Just because I may be outspoken and won't back down from how I feel or what I believe in I WILL NOT be treated like an object or less than because I am just a girl who wants to speak her mind and know what her surroundings are...being scared is never going to control me...ever..

I learned A LONG time ago that being apart of this goofy family gave me nerves of steel....and taught me everything I needed to know about standing up for yourself and that I am going to continue doing....I stand up for people I believe in and love...who love me back!

I ADORE people who love me, respect me and respect my privacy and my beliefs which is what I think any American is entitled to! GOD BLESS AMERICA.

Dad thank you for teaching me how to be a strong person.I love you more than anything and hope to see you soon.

nite nite.

just life again...

Things have been CRAZY.

First off I don't even no where to begin.It's funny how your life can change in a matter of a few weeks.I can't talk about all the BS going on in my life...LOL!...There's way too much BS...Sometimes I think I can't stand anymore of it and then I throw my head back and laugh myself silly! always find laughter in the toughest times!..just be a silly like me.

When things get bad you gotta pick yourself up and go on and NEVER LOOK BACK.Which is something I have always done..since..well, FOREVER.So when a hurricane hits you like a ton of bricks..i just go:"Oh well here we go again" and I giggle and make fun of idiots that I don't want in my life and all that stupid stuff....Can you deal with this? Can I?....Hmm...I think I can.Because I just don't give a sshht!

One thing that really bothers me is I miss my Dad so much.I wish I could talk to him..But I can't...he's busy working I suppose.I wanted to see him at Christmas but I didn't get too...but things will get better I know.I think about how he told me that day he was proud of me and I could do anything I wanted to..if I wanted cows I could have cows and just because I am a girl people may try to tell me that I couldn't do something like that and he said i could have cows and do anything I wanted---not to ever let anyone tell me that i couldn't do something I wanted...because he believes in me and loves me that much!!! that means a lot to me he said that!

he also told me that day that I needed to start taking up for myself...and he was right....Haha!!! that makes me laugh myself silly.Because I am so much like him it's spooky.I even look a lot like him and I love that we look alike.I am so proud of my DadChad.He is the only reason I am alive and I love him for being my Daddy.I'm just his daughter and I am so proud that he is my Dad!

I look up to him because I think he is everything that I would want myself to be like.Because he is tough and he doesn't care what people think about him....I wish I was more like him.So I want to be that tough too.I will always be there for my Dad and whatever he needs help with I will help him and take care of him...because ya know what?...he would do the same for me..

But I can't talk to him yet because he is soooo busy but things are gonna be better soon!...I just hope I get to see him soon.I know I will...

I want to tell him that I love you Dad! I can't wait to give you the biggest hug in the world when I see you!

Families are the compass that guide us.

they are an inspiration.

hugs!!!

Families are the compass that guide us. They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter.

Brad Henry

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/bradhenry167809.html#k4EcwYYWjpK23PuH.99

Families are the compass that guide us. They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/b/brad_henry.html#EVBYqhhsyl6ARHue.99

Families are the compass that guide us. They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/b/brad_henry.html#EVBYqhhsyl6ARHue.99