lost by the lake....

Rather cold and windy yesterday and today..Target practicing was really windy and cold..Brr!...I was eating sand most the time because it blew sand off the hill into everybody's mouth...Haha!!!...it was really gritty when you tried to talk or anything..i had on sunglasses and a blue white checker jacket thing I wear that is old...but comfortable...we practiced 35mins probably total....I hit the bulls-eye every shot...I'm so proud of me.

went to lunch at Pizza Hut with my family who took me practice shooting...then went looking at old shops downtown at my Grandpa's old hometown...

then we drove around the lake and they showed me the huge lake and it was so pretty!...really vast and I'm sure it has a lot of fish in it!..there were some fly fisherman out on the edge of the banks in the water with waders on....I know they had to be COLD...dedicated fisherman..too cold for this girl!...lol....I don't like cold and windy weather at all..but when it gets to be 112 degrees this summer I'm sure I will have a different idea....lol.

we got lost taking a different route home from the lake!..it was too funny...my cousin was trying to figure out which lake road was the right way home and she kept laughing....finally she didn't have to call her husband because we saw a highway after going through all those tree lined country roads and there was the highway!!!..we made it back to her house safe and sound...it was fun..i was very tired though when I got home.

so glad we got home before dark..kinda spooky around there...if you get lost at nite..eek!

love j.

electronics.....

Since the weather has warmed up it feels great to get out of the house as much as I can...Sooooooo TIRED of staying home so much...I feel like I should get out more and enjoy town and being around my grandparents and other family....it's good to leave the house and explore the world sometimes...lol

I usually like to stay home but I get kinda antsy staying home so much since I haven't seen many of my friends anymore...I know they are busy and I'm just a country girl stuck out in the middle of nowhere....haha...they have busy lives I know...

finally figured out how to set the dvd player with my tv..it gets rather complicated when you have so many cords to work with and plug into the tv....I need a blu ray player like everyone else it seems but I'm happy with this good old dvd player...

watching the dvd seasons  of 24  tv series) my favorite tv show ever!!!...it's really good like a movie actually...I don't have all the season yet..i just have 3, 6, 7, 8....funny I know...I have just found those so far they are sort of tough to find in the stores...but I will try to collect all of them..i will sleep better now getting to watch 24....

going target practicing again with my other family...

thinking of painting the house gray ? or white ? or ?...something calm and cool....

btw, I hate cellphones..using my old one again...I HATE CELLPHONES...never can get them to work....

nite nite.

nerd slush....

Went with Grandparents today to help take them to Dr. appointments....I love them so much!!!

Bought a sonic slush called Blue Raspberry Nerd slush!!!...haha...it's blue and has nerd candy in it...I have to laugh at myself because I am a nerd..so I guess it's good for nerds......and nerds who like the color blue, like me!!!...haha.

got my haircut the other day...it' so nice to finally get it cut and my head feels lighter....not so weighed down with all that hair because I have really thick strong hair and the beautician told me that too..she was really sweet and down to earth...she didn't try to sell me a billion hair care products or anything like that and she was very helpful and gave me hair instruction on how to use a flat iron the right way to not damage my hair.....really helpful she took the time to show me that..Thanks!

went target practice shooting..i did really good my cousin told me(on the other side of my family)...her husband was really detailed in his instruction on gun safety and taught me a lot about how to use a gun and fire and be careful how I used the gun and pointed it at targets...it was really a lot of fun for me to learn about that...I learned a lot more than I ever have before about guns and gun safety...

it's a good thing to learn new things everyday.....it can be helpful in the future if you ever need to use a gun to protect yourself---being a single girl lots of girls need to be able to survive on their own and have ways to protect themselves from harm...

I do not own a gun.....my family members have guns...I'm  really interested in target practicing and shooting at water bottles filled with water and watching them disintegrate into pieces....had a lot of fun!!!

thinking about painting the outside of the house soon...sick of this color.ideas ideas...

worrying for no reason...

Right now I want to talk about how worried I get about everything all the time and I do worry for no reason..I worry so much I have had an ulcer before that lasted for quite awhile..i was worrying about my family and missing them more than I could stand...crying is ok but it's not good for anybody to cry so much over silly things.

I suppose it's ok to miss people and worry about them all the time but too much is not good for anyone..time and how far away they are really upsets me and everyone who loves someone in their family or even their life...

I tend to worry so much that I get myself worked up into an anxiety and I will sometimes cry about that stupid silly stuff and be insecure...when I know it will all be ok..and someday I will get to see them even if its not going to be right now I have faith that God will see me through my upset feeling...I don't know why humans have to feel so much..i wish I could be numb to a lot of things in life just like the cows in the pasture they sure don't sit around chewing their hay and wondering about stupid things in life I'm sure or over analyzing EVERYTHING all the time like I do.

I have a lot of people who do love me and care about me and I know they do it's just so tough when you can't be with them all the time.

I think I need to just accept how things are and go on with my life the best way I can right now..so when I feel hurt I just go on, it's all I can do...i hope I don't go crazy feeling so much and missing so much..but I know I have God to get me through all things in life...he's always with me...when I am scared.I found this bible passage from a relative who told me about it this morning...it helps me...maybe it will help someone else.

so as of today I will NOT worry so much and everyday I will continue to get better.

Luke 12:24-34

Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds!  Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life ?  Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?  "Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.  If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith!  And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it.  For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them.  But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.  "Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.  Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

weaning calf.....

Been outside this morning fed my calf Stormy got her down to half a bottle of powdered milk..half in the morning and half in the evening...she's also been getting 3 scoops of creep pellets she likes to eat that with some alfalfa hay--I got a few bales from my uncle L...he just gave them to me so I appreciated that!!! nice of him to help me out with this stuff.

so Stormy really likes to eat alfalfa hay and her creep pellets more than a bottle now I think..she also drinks plenty of water so I'm kinda trying to wean her off the powdered milk bottle..she likes water more so now but she needs lots of water....summer will be here soon and all animals and people need to drink lots of water..i know I need to..lol

it rained a lot this morning so that makes me feel better about having cows and no drought going on (hopefully we won't)and I get really worried about that because I think of the ponds drying up and the creeks and all that kinda thing happening...because no rain means NO green fields and pastures and no green grass to eat for the cows and other animals...

I don't want another drought to happen.

Wish I could get a new horse...dream dream dream..maybe someday...don't matter what kind I'd just love to have one to go riding in the pastures and stuff again...my grandpa used to have one and I used to get to ride it when I was younger and I loved that horse his name was Gus...but he got old and nobody could ride him anymore.....but anyway I'd just like a new horse someday.

I really want Freckles back I thought that horse was so pretty..maybe sometime...such a pretty horse.

the barn leaks real bad I noticed this morning so I need to get it repaired for storing hay and farming things in there it needs all that old dirt scooped out and redone but a girl can dream can't she I do anyway..i like projects like that...maybe someday I could build me a new barn in a couple hundred years!!!...haha...

excited to go target shooting tomorrow!!! hope it's not too muddy tomorrow.I am getting my hair cut tomorrow..nervous and kinda excited to get that done and see some of my other family for a while....it's good for me to get away from here for a day and see different people and things..it's good for me to just get in the car and go somewhere else for a day....