someone to believe in.....

Just had to blog about the talk me and Grandpa had yesterday.....I think he is the wisest man i know and he is a treasure to my life...when the world doesn't make sense and i have lost hope in the world Grandpa can make you see things in a different light....
We were talking about how the world doesn't have as many heros as there was at one time...and the good people that there are in the world don't get hardly ANY attention for the heroic good things they give to the world....saving lives,making a difference,taking a stand...and the world is full of good people who are heros every day...more people need to grow the hell up and do something good in their life....tired of all this evil stupid crap.

sometimes it seems as though the media and people of the world want to glorify the bad things/people in life....well,we know why the news does--to make money like everything else....lol....but somedays i swear it seems like all of humanity is going down the toilet....you can't respect people who rob/steal/kill for no reason or for drugs....i can't respect people like that..or people who bully others because they are different or whatever....lost souls.

Grandpa was talking about the old days when he was younger how the outlaw life was necessary to get by because everyone was seriously starving and how they had hero outlaws who robbed and gave to the poor...the outlaws back then had some class...they weren't cracked out meth heads robbing/stealing/killing over drugs or just to be killing no reason at all..mostly it was to have something to eat and to help out the poor.....sure they had murderers back then and insane people...but more so the outlaw was held up as a hero...simply because they did at least help out in some ways.....i think quite possibly i could admire an outlaw back in the 20's,30's...because they did do some good...

But nowadays, NOPE...the "so called outlaws" now are nothing but thugs,meth heads,addicts,...they're all self-centered and will do anything to feed their habits...kill anyone for it...it's a very dangerous game with all those chemicals killing their brains....they think they're all bad-ass and cool..Yawn!.but all i see is a bunch of messed up dangerous losers who let chemicals/other people control them.....no respect....but if they change...i will respect that..soooo until then.....

i won't judge them because obviously something painful caused it....but i won't believe in them til i see they wanna change...

i really believe that people all over the world want and need a hero...people are sick & tired of being let down and they're tired of all the killing and the evil..tired of the stupid chaos in the world...they all want someone to believe in,to look up to and have faith in...someone human...sure, you've got your spirituality and your God to have faith in,but i'm talking about an earthly being that you can see in your life everyday that you can believe in...i know i have my heros...

we all can't be the tough guys and make those big drastic good changes...Fate has the right individuals picked out for those super dangerous missions....thank goodness for that..

sometimes it takes the right person with the right know how,and strength to protect,be strong, go in there and get good things done..and have the balls to do it.....to go after and catch the baddies or stop them from all their dangerous stupid antics....make a good difference....give us all someone to believe in!!!.. ;)

if anyone knows anything about outlaws it would be me,considering part of my family has been so crazy....i've never taken part in that insanity..i've just set back and sadly watched them destroy their lives all these years...but it's been a great learning experience for me.....at least some good did come from it..i watched and learned to avoid that mess..by watching them screw up...haha

i wouldn't ever judge people for what they do or how they live their life..but i do know that people can change and heal.....once they do change you see that some of those guys have hearts..it's just all covered up with abuse/addiction/pain.....everyone has their scars..nobody is perfect...and if they say they are,they are lying!...haha..

the real bad asses are the tough guys and girls who get up every morning and make a good difference in the world,who care and are strong enough to do the right thing and fight to make good changes,protect and be tough for us all.......they're the bad asses...it's not drug dealers or thieves or thugs....booooring!

i always tell them---"Give me someone that i can believe in,be proud of, and look up to...Be that person please?."....because god knows we need all the heros we can get...

xoxo

chillin' and grillin'....haha...

Sooooo it's Memorial Day weekend......Nothing special planned..chillin'..being lazy.....i'm just grilling out shrimp and things with friends...They're already being nerds and Eli keeps yelling:"Throw another shrimp on the barbie!"...Bwahaha! shut-up already!...Haha!...because we saw the Australians last night after working...haha..they have the coolest accents...sigh.

Would so LOVE to be with ALL of my family this weekend,but i know that's probably not possible.....they're wherever they are, and i don't know if what they are doing allows them to have time off?....so confused and miss them so much.... ;(

i thought maybe i might get to see my Dad this weekend or at least talk to him sometime?....This is all so confusing....I really wish i could see him...but oh well...whatever they're doing they've gotta stay serious and focused....there'll be plenty of time to see them all in the future...I just hope that he and the rest of the family know just how proud we are of them and how much we love them and want them to be safe...

was going to take off on another shopping trip to Oklahoma City..BUT...realized that it was Memorial Day Weekend and the crazies will all be out on the roads and etc...too crowded...so we opted for possibly next week a shopping excursion....lol...

have a safe weekend and don't let anyone drive drunk..throw their keys on top of the roof if they try to get them.....lol....

thank you to all the veterans who died/and or served for our country.

Happy Memorial Day!!!

smokey air......

All morning the sky has been smokey and the sun has looked pink or a weird orange....Kinda pretty actually until i stepped out the door and smelled smoke....
News said it's from the New Mexico fires burning and blowing this way in the wind....Gee, thanks New Mexico fire.... ;(

It's very windy and smokey....just great...*coughs and cries*... ;(

Just when a girl is getting better from stupid pneumonia...why do i even try?!!....

i hate you smokey wind!!!

going to fix a quick lunch and then back to work.

kisses.

oh boy....an owl visit....

Didn't get much sleep last night for the owl hooting all night outside my bedroom window....the dogs kept barking at it....LOL!....I tried blocking the hooting out with the tv.....still heard it...i tried putting the pillow over my head to sleep...still heard it.....it's just the fact you hear it once and you know it's there...lol.

this morning i started worrying or looking for weirdness..lol...it's all around here naturally, so i probably wouldn't notice anything really...haha

Considering the tribal mythology great grandma unfortunately passed down to me when i was a little girl...i have been scared of them ever since...I'm already very superstitious.....and then having her tell me all that about the owl and how they are warning of doom or death....yeah it drives me crazy worrying it means something!!!.....

my entire life i have been terrified when one starts hooting, because 9 times out of 10 through-out the years it does mean something...and someone usually dies or i will have some kind of weird incident with something...anything...even weirds things like a flat tire on the road after a hoot....and once an owl landed on my car after night class i was stopped at a gas station while i was on the way home filling up the car, it landed and stared at me and flew away...so see, i try to tell myself it's not always a bad sign...they are spirit guides and can be protectors or advisers and Eli believes they seek out the spiritual/intuitive/psychic humans who will listen to them...haha..and they also mean good fortune...fingers crossed on that one!!! ;)

i guess i'm just on high alert after it visited here and hoo-ed all night...considering all the crap going on around here you know?...i'm pretty leery and worrying what it meant....maybe nothing?....maybe it means good things are on the way...yeah,that's what i'm telling myself!!!...yikes.

IN the mean time, i'm being extra careful,saying my prayers for me and everyone/everything i love, and wearing my blue....yes,i'm very superstitious!!!...i don't care if it's nutso...lol..can't be too careful with this tribal legend myth stuff...you don't mess around with it...you have to respect it....

I kept thinking all night:"Owl please shut-up, i sooooo don't need this right now!" "Oh....geez....you shouldn't have stopped by the tree for a visit,you coulda just flown on by..no need to stop by and see little ol' me."...*scared face* *runs and hides*!!!

more home pics...

driving.

get off the road Mr.Buffalo!

another mountain road.

storm.

xoxo

Oh...i don't know.....

Feeling a little better this morning...think i will survive!...lol....I think the z-pack kicked the pneumonia so far....well, that and plenty of rest...i've pretty much had the past few days off work...just a few simple things to do..like be total lazy and lay around sleeping....lol
i've been really tired and grouchy...People will call and ask me something or talk to me and my answer to everything is :tired sigh:"Oh, i don't know."...haha..it's like i'm so tired i don't care to give good answers...

I'M SORRY to all my fam & friends for being a boring,lazy,reclusive zombie the past few days!...blame pneumonia not me!

STUPID WIND STOP BLOWING!!!...i'll get sick again!...god i hate you sometimes wind...

nothing eventful has really went on except i had to shoot a snake...Bwahaha!..if that counts for something?....LOL....it was right by the front porch step and the other door to the house was locked,i couldn't get in the house it kept striking at me like it was going to bite me!.....and it almost bit the dogs so i got my gun out of the truck and had to shoot it...it was all i could do...god...i sound like such a hillbilly now journaling about that!.lmao!...

It was either a King Snake or a Bull snake..NO Rattle-snake thank the lords!...lol..

Friends came over last night and we played guitars and they drank a few mixed drinks...i didn't because of the antibiotic and i feel like puking it's so harsh on my stomach... :(  we still can't go to the bars or have any night life..sooooo til then......it'll have to work.

Now tonight,we're supposed to play a round of Canasta at my Grams' house....good ol' Canasta...haha....i love family time...

a few pics of home...off to breakfast...xoxo

walking pneumonia it is.....

Turns out that i DO have "walking pneumonia".....

The Dr. visit went well...I was so terrified i would have high blood pressure but NOPE!...everyone in my family is a hot head so they all have high blood pressure genetically....lol...none of us are overweight or anything...it's just genetic...so i'm terrified i will have it one day.....i watch what i eat  usually,and i exercise....so that helps hopefully!...

I had a fever and my lungs were "rattling" as the doc called it...he explained to me that allergies and working in the dust and wind so many days with crazy up and down temps is a great recipe for walking pneumonia....and stress....lol....we know what idiots cause the only stress in my life lately..ahem.

I told him how i have been feeling so run down and exhausted and he said anytime you have any type of pneumonia it drains your energy...i can attest to that fact.

he gave me a Z-Pack and something called "Prednisone" that is a steroid that helps your lungs open up.....ooh steroids!...haha..i can kick ass now!...LOL....yeah, well, it's only for a few days to take until my lungs open up.....

I am feeling a little better after today being only the 2nd day for my medicine,still no energy really....but boy,it made me feel sick last night....my stomach was burning and i felt like puking....i have to avoid the sun for a few days which is impossible considering i am a cowgirl!!!...i got a little faint this evening when driving back to the house after feeding cows/horses....got too hot in the sun i guess moving those feeders over by the fence...yikes..only 20minutes is all i was out there!

but i will survive i suppose...antibiotics will throw you for a loop if you don't eat enough with them....i can't eat anything with milk/calcium in it which makes me limited....no cheese,no yogurt,no milk,no butter...none of that stuff....today i made spaghetti at noon when i had an hour off work for lunch...it was good...

anyhow while waiting in line at Walgreens for my prescription a girl told me she loved my western purse..you know that turquoise one...i told her"Oh thanks! that's very sweet of you to say.".....she asked me if i had the flu like she had and i said:"Nope walking pneumonia."..she goes:"That sucks...it's bad everybody is getting it around here!".....kinda nice to know i am not the only one miserable with it....

in Walgreens i had to buy myself a little reward for going to the Dr...and something to make me feel better...LOL (i have to bribe myself)...so i spied this nail color called Rockstar Pink...it's by Sally Hansen or something like that...Wow!..it's so sparkly and pretty..got lots of compliments...i'm wearing it now...yes,i'm a nerd about things..but that's just me being me...haha!

pneumonia kisses!

i'm sick.....

Just got home blog....can't believe i haven't been online in so many days!....

Finished up work this evening, then met up with friends for fast food..Taco Bell!...haha!...we all had to go try that Doritos Taco shell taco they have!...LOL...yes, we are nerds but Omg! Doritos are the best chip!..it was really good i think...haha!......

We were standing there this evening inside the Taco Bell and it was packed full of people eating in there....the heavy downpours started and the streets were starting to get flooded so we all look at each other and go:"OH NO!"....we grabbed our orders as fast as we could and decided to leave....we don't wanna get stranded in that town at nighttime in a flood of all things!...yikes....

we got out of town and made it home luckily,no prob bob!

I haven't been feeling good at all....i keep coughing,sneezing and terrible sinus headache...so after weeks of putting off making a Dr. appointment(because i hate going..scarey!)...i finally made me a Dr. appointment this morning....seems as though EVERYONE and their dog is sick apparently.....they had to squeeze me in for Monday morning at 8:15am...it was all they had available the rest the week...a cancellation and luckily i called in at the right time and made it my appointment.......

i have no energy and i feel exhausted and don't feel like doing nothing but sleeping,crying or griping...

this is me..if i had a battery.......i'm loooow...LOL...

My Grandma goes:"You've probably got a kidney infection now kid, or walking pneumonia!!!...not going to the Dr...didn't you learn not to mess around and let infections go?!...they only get worse and cause other things!"...i just set there and let her blah..blah..blah....

i always think:Ohhhh..it's ok...please don't tell dad i'm sick again...pretty please?!...i don't wanna hear lectures,and he doesn't need to be worried about me with all the other stress he's working in/with.....wherever he is right now....hope he's ok... ;(

nite~nite everyone...

hot/humid day in OKC...

Escaped with friends yesterday to OKC again to go shopping and have fun....somewhere away from here and all this annoying stuff going on...had fun getting away from here....the only downside is that it got really hot and humid in the city...uncomfortable....the car was like a sauna when we got in it afterward in the parking lot...lol... 

work has been busy...at least i avoided getting smacked with the gate friday after that bull ran through there and the gate went flying backwards...

luckily i WAS paying attention and i saw the gate flying back toward me...close one!..seriously you can get hurt easily if you are not alert at all times...you can get stampeded by herds and hooked by their horns...and those bulls will throw you against the fence,get you down on the ground and stomp you..kick you,try to kill you...some of them are really crazy....they weigh a lot...they're not small animals by any means....i feel like a tiny ant compared to how huge those bulls are.....

so you ALWAYS gotta watch yourself while in a corral or out near them in the pasture....you can't trust what they will do...ever...just like hillbilly cousins!...lmao...

We kept laughing about what i said yesterday morning about bug spray..LOL...i said:"Too bad they don't make a hillbilly spray! to keep the hillbillies away!".....Haha..everybody cracked up laughing...But that is so true..too bad they don't make a hillbilly spray....man..that would be awesome!..i'd buy a whole case of that kinda spray...i would take out stock in it on the stock market!!!... ;)

they're all sooooo annoying and stupid!!!..sick of them!..i just wanna scream at them:"Go away!..Nobody wants to listen to your crap!...nobody cares!..leave me alone hillbillies!...god!"

Didn't really buy much actually at the mall yesterday....i was in a shopping mood but all i ended up buying was my favorite perfume smell from Victoria's Secret which is "Bombshell"...i got the mist yesterday...love it..i like mists better than the perfume...not so over-powering..but anyway, that's my favorite fragrance from that store i wear it all the time...

i also bought another lip stain...lol...told ya i was gonna try to collect all of them!!!..workin' on it anyway!....haha..this one is called EverBloom Kiss or something like that...it's really pretty...my fave so far of the lip stains i've been buying....

I also bought a plain blue t-shirt that is just for wearing outside working in..i have to admit i know t-shirts aren't a big deal..but they are VERY comfortable and i'm happiest in a t-shirt and jeans...it doesn't get more simple than that....and i'm not in any style contest around here...LOL....i could care less...i want to be comfortable and happy.....and it just so happens that wearing blue t-shirts & jeans makes me happy!!!... ;)

we had lunch at a great french restaurant...it was really nice..i'm fascinated by how they make the cute little pastries and chocolates...i like cooking things...you can tell i have french blood....haha...

anyways,better go it's early and there's work to be done....24/7..but i like it..i don't have it bad..no complaints from this girl...

Kisses.





i LOVE music......

Just heard this song and i love it...so pretty!

Already been a very busy week...lots more work to get done this afternoon...

so tired....hate getting this tired..waking up is so hard to do some mornings....at least i did get to sleep in a little today...

xoxo