happily single....thank you very much.....

It's been raining the past few days!...and got chilly...finally i got to take all my fall/winter clothes out of storage and wear them....still haven't dyed my hair yet...i don't know how those colors will work on my hair yet...investigating all that before i buy it and use it on my hair...i don't want green hair or something!...haha...

Had to buy a wedding gift for a local couple in town...i bought some red $35 baking dish thing they "ordered" on their 14page long gift registry....I got invited to the shower and wedding.gee,no thanks for the invitation...they're really young and both total spoiled brats...the bride to be, has already turned into a bridezilla and wants everything PERFECT..and they have spent no less than $23,000 on this crap..ridiculous....lol...yeah it's gonna last...LOL!!!...

my Grandma was saying yesterday:"Always somebody wantin' a gift for a wedding/baby shower!...you may never see them, but oh you are getting asked for a damn gift...all i get them is a glass pitcher and a towel..good enough....they aren't gonna stay married...they'll take it back for the money anyway, how all these idiots are!"....haha...

always seems to crack me up how they think they have to spend all the big bucks on getting married,go into crazy debt for it,and then get divorced in a few years...just like everyone else does...people are so stupid i swear..but that's their problem/business not mine.

I've never wanted to get married or have any kids--don't want the responsibility or to be tied down with that mess...i've had many offers...lol....BUT i just don't care anything about ruining my life....now, if i had lived in the 30's,40's, or 50's or some era like that...i would probably have believed in that...people are too reckless,heartless,cold,gold-digging, and crazy for me to ever believe in something like marriage....i know i would get my heartbroken so bad over that i would probably never recover....so i just don't care..

I come from a family of nothing but divorces/chaos so i don't have the ability to believe in something stupid like a fairytale...life has never been stable actually,i have watched all the people in my family and how it all crumbles...how life really is you know?..what happens....most my friends are divorced now and some of them have kids and they always tell me:"Stay single!..don't ruin your life like i have!..you're so smart and lucky!"

i've never understood why all the time growing up all the girls in school would sit around and talk about their future wedding and having kids etc...i've just never wanted that..a boyfriend is enough for me...i suppose they always thought i was weird or something...i could care less what they thought or would think now..my life/ideas not theirs.Haha!!!just like they could care less what i would say about theirs..

But i'm glad i have that ability to protect my heart from heartbreak and be smart..I'm just not capable of ever having enough belief in marriage to have feelings like that to think i could stay married to someone or would ever want to be....i get bored easily with people...so i think it's best i stay single and free--i'm happy and comfortable that way.....NO hurt feelings and NO court costs!....lol

i have to have my freedom..never tied down...i don't let others break my spirit or my heart.....ever...if there's ever gonna be any heart breaking?....i'm going to do the breaking from now on....Haha...I don't really believe that romantic love ever lasts..it fades.....BUT i DO believe in platonic love like you have for your family/friends..it does last..never fades...that is real love...it's very strong.

nobody gets married in our family...they just don't....all the men in our family have all those hoards of disposable wild women party girlfriends and they are happy with that....then the aunts/girl cousins that are single now have all their wild party men,just boy toys..that are disposable at any time.lol...they seem happier than ever..LOL!just like my friends are...like everyone is...haha!

and me i'm a very happily single girl...someday a long time boyfriend maybe,whenever i find the right one.....I'm comfortable with my OWN money,house/land,pets,friends,family,ideas,inspirations,dreams..and most importantly..my freedom...I am my own boss and that is how it's going to be....

xoxo